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23 Months Down

11.29.09

Today marks 23 months of waiting and takes us into our 24th month.

Due to a new director, the adoption bureau did not sending out matches in November.

Thus, we won’t be receiving our Miracle Match by December 1st.

I’ve been trying to figure out why I’m still so shocked about all of this and I think that it comes down to the fact that when we began this process in 2007 expats were told to expect a 10-12 month wait. TOPS.

If you applied to adopt from China today, any agency would say to expect a 5-7 year wait. Expats are warned to expect a 4-6 year wait . Since we must live in China for one year before filing a dossier, our wait times are exactly the same as those families living in the US.

Of course, there have been unexpected dilemmas along the way: signing into the Hague Agreement + 2008 Sichuan Earthquake + Olympics + 2009 Swine Flu + 10 days October Holiday + a new director.

Another month has passed and no expats have been matched which means our line hasn’t moved at all. There is a rumor that expats with a log-in-date of August 2007 will be matched in December 2009.

If the adoption bureau continues matching month per month, then we could be looking for a match in April 2010. Of course, there is no guarantee that matching will occur each month. In the past, we’ve been skipped for 2 or 3 months before the next in line is matched. Your guess is as good as mine.

We’ll be having another Christmas without our child. The void that I thought couldn’t get any bigger just widen beyond my emotional capacity.

My sister has a tradition of buying Schäfer a Hallmark Keepsake ornament each year. Last year, I took a step of faith and bought a Hallmark Keepsake ornament for our adopted child. Since we were supposedly going to be matched soon, I went ahead and bought our child a 2008 ornament thinking they would probably have been born in that year so they would need an ornament.

2009-01-21@10-14-33
I looked long and hard to find the perfect ornament to represent 2008. “Baby’s First Christmas” didn’t seem right since we didn’t have that first Christmas together. Ultimately, I decided on Snoopy and Woodstock perched on a sweet house waiting because that was us in 2008 – waiting and ready for our wee one to come home. (I realize that the ornament is more about us than the child, but it was hard to shop for a baby whose age and personality are unknown.)

When we were feeling very optimistic for a Miracle Match, I went to Hallmark.com and found this Keepsake Ornament to represent 2009:

Screen shot 2009-12-07 at 10.54.35 PM

I believed we would finally become a Forever Family in 2009. Well, we aren’t. Another year of following rumor blogs and forums has passed.

Over the weekend, when we pulled out The Christmas Box, I saw the Snoopy ornament and experienced some unexpected and overwhelming emotions. The ornament reminded me of how long this journey has been and how the unknown waiting has worn me down.

For now, the ornament is staying in the box. When our precious one comes, then we will hang it on the tree.

6 comments to 23 Months Down

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